Super conscientious, damn good at her job, reliable, hardworking, and committed to striving for excellence.

What kind of picture does this paint? Someone at the top of their game? This was definitely a viable perspective of me some years ago. However, I would also need to add the following to describe that same me at that very same time:

Running on adrenaline, frequently fatigued, underweight, anxious, traumatized, and constantly so sick to her stomach that she carried Pepto Bismol in her bag. (Fact. It makes me cringe to think about it.)

You see, highly sensitive people (HSPs) are masters of people-pleasing, and this has been my Achilles heel for a long time now. We so intuitively know how others feel, what they need, and what to do to meet those needs. We hate to disappoint, and because we empathize so deeply with others, our own needs can become enmeshed with those of the people around us, often inevitably being ignored in favor of others’.

Learning to Calm Down Our Highly Sensitive Bodies

Now here is the problem: When we HSPs are unaware that being highly sensitive is an actual thing, we can be drawn into trying to mold and force our highly sensitive bodies into roles and ways of being that just aren’t suited to us. Even worse, into situations that cause our systems to become overwhelmed and stressed out. Maybe even cause them to collapse and burn out. But…

…enter yoga.

I genuinely feel blessed that the practice of yoga came into my life. In my opinion, yoga is an essential practice for everyone, but it has specific benefits for HSPs that makes it my number one suggestion for any HSP struggling to flourish. Here are nine reasons why.

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9 Ways Highly Sensitive People Can Benefit From Yoga

1. It will regulate your overstimulated nervous system.

Every HSP is different and will have their own story and history. However, one thing is for sure — our nervous systems are more sensitive to the world and we process stimulation on a much deeper level. This makes us more likely to experience stress and anxiety. 

In general, the sequence of a typical yoga class allows the nervous system to practice moving from rest to a “safe” level of stimulation, before returning back to rest. This can be a super effective way to train your nervous system, in particular for those HSPs who have experienced trauma of any kind.

2. Your breathing will help your system return to its base level.

The breath is the golden ingredient to a yoga class that packs a big punch in terms of aiding regulation of the nervous system, but also in being able to take your yoga off the mat. During daily life, when things become overwhelming, the breath has the power to return your system to its base level. 

As one of my teachers calls it, the breath becomes your BFF! The quality of your breath impacts so many things, and when we start to work with deeper, more complete breaths, we are not only stretching and activating the respiratory muscles, but are also literally toning the nervous system, in particular the vagus nerve (which has a central role in the relaxation response).

3. Yoga brings you into your body, which makes you focus inward instead of outward.

Yoga brings you quite literally into your own body. As well as all the general physical benefits — yoga is good for your heart, gives you more energy, and can help you sleep better — it is an inward-focused practice that asks you to pay attention to your own physicality, which makes ignoring yourself very difficult! 

When you are on your mat, it is your space and time to attend to your needs, like your very own HSP sanctuary. With practice, this can help us HSPs to recognize our own true needs from the needs of those around us. 

4. It gives our overstimulated senses a chance to reboot.

In Patanjali’s Yoga-Sutras, he talks about the practice of Pratyahara as one part of the yogic path. This refers to a “withdrawal of the senses.” While the point of Prathyahara is not so much to give our senses a break, but to guide us inward towards the state of meditation, it does serve those of us who need a sensory break! Modern life is often full of too much for our eyes, ears, skin, and so on, to take in. From device screens and traffic noise, to itchy, synthetic clothing… the list goes on (especially for HSP!). 

What better way to allow our senses time to reboot than to spend an hour or so in comfy clothes, moving, breathing, maybe with our eyes closed or with some dim lighting, too. There may even be a chance to do so with some soft music, or perhaps silence. What joy and a wonderful way to calm our HSP senses.

Need to Calm Your Sensitive Nervous System? 

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That’s what you’ll find in this powerful online course by Julie Bjelland, one of the top HSP therapists in the world. You’ll learn to turn off the racing thoughts, end emotional flooding, eliminate sensory overload, and finally make space for your sensitive gifts to shine.

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5. It helps nourish your sensitive body, like improving your circulation.

Having a more sensitive body can often mean that HSPs experience more intolerances, inflammation, and immune reactivity. As someone who has had flare ups of irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) my whole life, I can now select specific practices that I know will give my body exactly what it needs to return to balance. 

From just a physical point of view, the combination of different types of movements (including forward bends, back bends, twists, side bends, arm balances, and inversions) — as well as working with a conscious breath — improves the circulation of blood and lymphatic fluids around the body. This movement of fluids allows fresh nutrients to be brought to areas that need it and waste materials to be moved along to be released, meaning you can feel nourished from the inside-out. Your body will love you for it!

6. It’ll help you get in touch with, and regulate, your emotions.

Emotions are physiological events and quite literally “energy in  motion”; they need to be felt and allowed to move through the body. The way in which we mindfully move the body in a yoga class can often provide the reflective space in which these sensations can be acknowledged, felt, and allowed safe passage. 

Since we HSPs feel emotions more intensely, it is even more important to give this time for emotions to be processed in this physical way. Time on the mat can become a sanctuary that creates space for processing the day’s events and any emotions that may have been brought up. Over time and with consistent practice, it also develops further insight into your own inner world: how your emotions feel as sensations in your body, what triggers them, where emotional tension can collect, and, most importantly, the practices that help you to best release them.

7. It’ll help you be kinder to yourself.

The whole practice of yoga, not just the asana (postures) come together to give you the best gift of all — deeply knowing and loving yourself. Yoga connects you to that place of deep inner knowing, your gut feeling, your intuition: the place where you truly know what it is that you want and need. Through this connection, a sense of empowerment can evolve as you start to give yourself permission to honor your needs and wants. 

One of the central philosophical teachings in yoga is of Ahimsa. Translating as “non-harming,” it can be viewed as the act of unconditional kindness to all living things. It teaches us that, if we want to treat others with kindness, then we must first start with ourselves. Working with this teaching can move us HSPs from constant people-pleasing and feeling responsible for other people’s feelings, to placing our own self-care as our top priority. 

8. A good yoga class will quiet your overstimulated mind and have it focus on just one or two things vs. 100.

As an HSP, having a rich inner world can be both a source of joy and pain. Sometimes the modern world, with its great big to-do list and expectations, can be just too much. Couple that with overthinking every conversation because you “sensed a tone” or felt the energy was “off,” and that monkey in your HSP brain can really run the show. And it can be exhausting! 

A good yoga class will gently guide your senses to focus on one or two things, such as the breath, or perhaps how a particular joint moves in your body, or even how a quality (such as expansion) can be expressed while in a posture. This guided focus might just mean that the “monkey mind” begins to hush a little, giving you a moment of peace from the overthinking mind. 

At the very least, yoga teaches you to step back and observe your own thoughts from a place of compassion. You might start to say, “Oh, there I am worrying about X again,” rather than getting swept away in those thoughts.

9. Yoga will give you the space to recognize your gifts as an HSP, like finding the beauty in your environment.

A lot of the above reasons are about how yoga supports the challenges that HSPs can face in the modern world. However, the biggest gift that yoga has given me is the space to recognize my personal gifts as an HSP and to view them as just that — gifts! Through my yoga practice, I am allowed to be me. I have permission to enjoy questioning the big things, to find beauty in nature and my environment, to find the joy in movement, and the sheer fun of expression through the written word. This is because yoga returns you to yourself. It brings you back to your truth and what it is that lights your fire. This is, for me, when the HSP spirit truly thrives.

The benefits of yoga, of course, do not come overnight, and it is most definitely a journey, one that I am still very much on. The journey is also not always a sweet one and requires the discipline to keep showing up, even when rolling out your mat feels like too much (and believe me, those days definitely come!). However, with consistent practice, time, and a good teacher, the benefits will slowly emerge. You will find a strength and calm within your HSP body and mind that may then allow your own unique and beautiful fire to burn brightly.

For more yoga inspiration, join my free Facebook group, “Stress Less, BE More,” a group that seeks to see HSPs thrive through the lens and support of yoga and other body-mind practices.

You might like:

• 3 Simple Mindfulness Practices for Highly Sensitive People
• 5 Lessons from a Yoga Teacher to Get You Through Quarantine
• 13 Signs You Are Overstimulated

The post 9 Ways Highly Sensitive People Can Benefit From Yoga appeared first on Sensitive Refuge.

I am a highly sensitive person (HSP), and I did not enjoy school. At all.

This is a really interesting reflection for me, as I am someone who loves to read, write, and learn about new things. When I was at school, I did as I was told, focused, and got through the best I could. I was one of those children who, from a teacher’s perspective, was in the “murky middle” — not underachieving, or overachieving, just okay. Perhaps even invisible.

This was actually quite alright with me (for the most part). I didn’t want to be seen. I wanted to just fade into everything and not draw attention. This wasn’t because I was shy, although it was a label I was often given. I did, in fact, have a lot that I wanted to share and express. The problem for me was that school was so hideously overwhelming. This is often the case for HSPs. It quite simply can be too much — on many fronts. This may feel familiar to you, dear reader. Perhaps you recall school being a painful time? Maybe you see the same thing happening for your highly sensitive children (HSC), too?

How School Can Cause Overload for Highly Sensitive People

This list is not exclusive and is based on my personal reflections as an HSP myself, a mother of two highly sensitive children, and my 10 years spent teaching in elementary schools. These are just some of the ways in which school can contribute to sensitive children feeling overwhelmed and stressed out.    

• Overstimulation is everywhere, from the lighting to the nonstop kids’ voices. An HSP’s senses can become overstimulated through high levels of noise, movement, colorful wall displays, hideous (and overbearing) strip lighting, and a wide variety of smells (also known as chemical sensitivity) and textures, not to mention uncomfortable (often itchy) uniforms. In order to learn well, highly sensitive children need to be comfortable and have just enough sensory stimulation, not too much.
• The fast pace of the school day can leave deep thinkers feeling frazzled. HSPs process more deeply, so they need more thinking time. Plus, lots of people in one place means lots of opportunities for HSPs to absorb and become affected by other people’s feelings even more so than usual. And sensitive kids often work better alone or in pairs. Big groups can be overwhelming, as can friendship groups. Due to the high level of empathy and the depth of feeling that comes along with the high-sensitivity trait, boundaries can be blurred and the ups and downs of any friendship can greatly impact highly sensitive children. They cannot simply grow a “thicker skin,” as harsh words hurt — and HSPs react strongly to criticism, no matter what their age.
• Target-driven culture pushes the conscientious nature of HSPs into perfectionism mode, which is a one-way road to anxiety. Highly sensitive kids need an open learning environment, where sharing is encouraged and personal growth (at your own pace) is celebrated. When I was in school, I was frequently told by teachers that I was “too serious” and needed to (cue eye roll) “lighten up” — but how do you do this when you think and feel so deeply and when the whole school experience is so very stressful? How can you be carefree and easygoing when your nervous system is on hyper alert from the sound of the first school bell to the last?

Early Childhood Experiences Shape HSPs as Adults

Being told often that I needed to become something that I wasn’t had the effect of invalidating my feelings, intuition, and own experience of the world. This is not okay. It has taken me years to understand myself better as an HSP and reconnect back to my true self. This journey is ongoing. 

When our societal systems invalidate children in this way and try to shoehorn them into badly misshapen boxes, they are damaging these sensitive souls and preventing their much-needed talents from being gifted to the world. By telling them “You’re too sensitive” or that they need to “toughen up,” we are effectively saying, “Don’t be you; pretend to be somebody else — what you are is not good enough.”

It sickens me when I think about this. Even worse is that this is still happening now. And not just in schools.

In his research, Thomas Boyc, M.D., found that for those who are highly sensitive, being in a high-stress environment meant they were much more likely to develop physical and mental health problems vs. their less sensitive peers. However, what is most intriguing is that in calm environments, HSPs had much better health than the less sensitive. 

The crux is this — when highly sensitive children are raised in a nurturing, supportive environment, they actually thrive, often doing better than average. Yet when they experience high stress, they are more likely than average to not thrive. I can completely testify to the truth of this. My own experience of leaving the high-stress job of classroom teaching and moving into something more in keeping with my own values — with a better work-life balance — has allowed my physical and mental health to thrive. In addition, I am relaxed and comfortable enough to create, and express myself, in a manner that better suits me.

How Can Teachers Support Highly Sensitive Children?

If you are a teacher, or work with children in schools, you are battling with many demands on your time — I know, I’ve been there. But, when considering the different groups of children in your class/school, take a moment to think about the following.

• Highly sensitive children need quiet time. Some kids are just born loud — that’s their style of learning and expressing themselves. But this is always at the expense of those of us on the sensitive side of the scale. Highly sensitive children need quiet time, but not just for concentrating on school work. Playtime might also be a time for quiet since a loud, busy playground may be the last thing they need after a stimulating lesson.  
• A bright, colorful classroom can be beautiful to look at… but can be sensory overload for highly sensitive children. When thinking about the learning environment, think “just enough” stimulation vs. overstimulation.
• Please do not sit the quiet sensitive child next to the one who you think they can be a “calming influence” for. The ones with the loudest voices are not the only ones who need to be considered.  
• Please be aware that they don’t do best with time-restricted tasks. As a general rule, highly sensitive kids probably won’t do well with time-restricted tasks, just like we HSP adults don’t like busy schedules or being rushed either. Unnecessary stress is not good for our highly sensitive nervous system.  
• Rethink group projects. “Group work” can be stressful, overwhelming, and can easily dampen the creative process. If groups must be used, consider everyone’s personalities, assign roles, and support the kids — especially those who may be struggling — as much as you can.
• Get to know the highly sensitive children in your classroom, like really get to know them. HSPs are deep people — they think in detail about everything. Get to know HSC and take time to get to know their background. Some may have a super supportive home life, but others may be struggling with stress at home. If the latter is the case, let school be a solace, not a source of more stress.
• Never critique children for being sensitive – and never say the dreaded “You’re too sensitive.” An upset child may be an inconvenience to the timetable of a school day, but that timetable is of no importance if that child is left scarred from big feelings that they do not know what to do with. Recognize their feelings, allow them space to feel them, and let them know that you are there for them. Be grateful that they shared those feelings with you.

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How Can Parents Support Highly Sensitive Children?

If you are a parent of a highly sensitive child, there are lots of things you can do to support your child at home (even if society still struggles with understanding our sensitivity trait).

• Figure out if you are highly sensitive yourself, for this will impact how you parent your child. If you are also an HSP, you must practice self-care as a priority. I cannot say this loudly enough: Take your self-care seriously! Your child will then learn how to take care of themselves. If you are overwhelmed, stressed, and burned out most of the time, you will not be at your best and will not be able to support your child/children in the way you know you’d like to. And then you will likely start beating yourself up about it, which is no fun! If you are not an HSP, read all you can on the topic so you can understand your child through this lens.
• Talk to others (teachers, family members, etc.) about what it means to be a highly sensitive person/child. Unfortunately, the trait of high sensitivity is still relatively unknown — and often not understood — in society. Awareness is growing, but it needs to pick up the pace. That’s why it can be helpful to have discussions about this trait with your child’s teacher and other family members. However, be careful to not use the term  “highly sensitive” to put your child in a box. Remember —  20 to 30 percent of people are HSPs, and within that, every single one of those people are a unique expression of life. This trait is normal and innate. The reason we need to support HSPs right now is because society currently doesn’t more often than not. 
• At home, talk about your highly sensitive child’s superpowers positively. We talk about my son’s hearing and “Spidey-Sense,” for example. In fact, being in a complete HSP household, we talk about our different Spidey-Senses and how useful they are — from our intuition to reading others’ body language and emotions to the way we feel everything so deeply. Explain to your HSC that, because these senses are so powerful, they need more time to themselves in order to recharge them.
• Provide your child with structured alone time for calm activities. I would suggest at least an hour in the evening without anything stimulating. In other words, time without things such as screens of any kind or really exciting stories that can overstimulate your HSC. (Creating an HSP sanctuary for them can come in handy, too!) My children enjoy baths, relaxing music, massage, yoga-style stretches, alone time, and just snuggling up in really comfy blankets. We don’t always need to chat either. My eldest (10 years old) is now getting quite good at knowing when he needs some downtime, but my youngest (seven years old) is not as aware, so I usually notice it for him. So keep your Spidey-Senses alert for your children who may not yet realize when they’ve had enough.
• Let your child cry — and that it’s okay to. Crying is a release of emotion and should never be shamed. Be careful about those male stereotypes seeping into your language, too, like “man up,” “brave soldier,” etc. The world is full enough with the message that boys “shouldn’t” be sensitive or cry. At the very least, let home be a place where feelings can be felt.
• Teach your child to understand their highly sensitive body. Teach them to tune in and to breathe well. This will help them calm down when they get overstimulated. (Plus, it’s a lifelong skill that I did not learn properly until my 20s.) Teach them this now and they will always have something to use when times get tough.

The world will not change overnight and neither will the way we teach — and raise — our children. However, the more our awareness and understanding grows, the better equipped we will all be to create the kind of environment where all children, all people, can thrive. As Maya Angelou said, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” Thanks, Maya. We certainly will.

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You might like:

• Is Your Child Highly Sensitive?
• What Sensitive Students Need From Their Teachers
• Do You Cry Easily? You Might Be a Highly Sensitive Person

The post The Best Way to Support Highly Sensitive Kids in School appeared first on Sensitive Refuge.